Just Emma & I

So.. I was thinking today that maybe I would take Emma to Europe and we could backpack around for a couple of weeks.  Is ten too young for such an adventure?  I get very nervous when faced with doing things on my own and being the one "in charge" or "responsible" for things / events.

I know that sounds weird considering how many things I am responsible for and how many things I am in charge of... and if I do say so myself, I do things quite well!  But as I said, I get nervous, all the same.  But I really think I am up to this challenge!

I really want Emma to experience life.  To appreciate culture and see the world.  I want for her, I suppose, what I wanted for myself, but was always to afraid to do.  Now I question my intentions... I'm I trying to live vicariously through Emma? hmmmm.... Even if I were, the experience for her would still be beyond amazing!  But I really want her to remember it... cherish it... prize it!!!

It really is amazing how blogging helps me think straight and figure things out.... As I type, I think back to my younger years.  Now I'm remembering that I really started having GOOD memories in about fifth grade, which will be next year for Emma.  I have some good memories from 4th grade, but I think fifth grade is when I really have emotions behind the memories. (does that make sense?)

Next year would probably be a better time to go... then I have time to plan things out.  If we were to go this summer it would really be by the seat of my pants.  Maybe I can even get in touch with my friend Tibor in the Czech Republic and Raymond in The Netherlands, and we could spend a day with each of them....   Definitely Good Times!

Trying to hard???? not so much...

I was worried that when I had Elliot I would not love my two children the same. That I would really have to try to love them equally, or enough, or whatever crazy things I thought... But it is, as so many mother's before me have said; your love just grows and you have more love to give, you don't divide the love.  I love both of my girls so very much, and I want to give each of them the best of me.  

I want to create unique experiences that I can share with each of them, so they know how special they are to my life.  I know that my love will be enough, but I'd really like to go the extra mile!  They are so worth it!